When my snooty neighbor’s son sent a baseball crashing through my window, I expected an apology and a repair. Instead, they refused to pay and threatened me. But karma swung in from the most unexpected direction with a much better payback!
Attention, peeps! Picture this: You’re setting the table with a meal you’ve poured your heart and soul into. Suddenly—WHAM! A baseball crashes through your window, shattering glass and plopping right into your dessert. Worse yet, your little girl was mere inches from getting her head smacked. Scary, right? Well, that’s exactly what happened to me…
A baseball on the verge of shattering a window | Source: Midjourney
I’m Angela, 36, proud single mom to my little firecracker Penny (6), and fur-mom to Pancy the poodle and Bella the cat.
The four of us live in a cozy cottage at the end of Maple Street, a picturesque slice of suburban heaven.
Our little family portrait would make Norman Rockwell weep with joy. But every masterpiece needs a villain, and ours lives right next door.
Houses in a neighborhood | Source: Midjourney
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the bane of my existence: Baron Bigshot.
Okay, that’s not his real name. But trust me, it fits him like a custom-tailored Armani suit (which he probably owns a dozen of).
Picture a middle-aged man with a perpetual scowl and a watch that costs more than my yearly salary. That’s Baron Bigshot for you.
Now, I’m not one to judge people based on their bank accounts. But when your neighbor’s lifestyle starts interfering with your peace of mind? That’s where I draw the line.
A man scowling | Source: Midjourney
Now, on to that fateful Saturday morning when it all started.
“Mom, can I play outside?” Penny asked, her big glistening eyes pleading.
I sighed, glancing at the window. “Sorry, sweetie. Baron Big… I mean, Mr. Next Door’s son is playing baseball again.”
Penny’s face fell. “But why can’t I play in our yard?”
How do you explain to a six-year-old that our yard has become a war zone, thanks to our neighbor’s spawn and his inability to aim?
It all started a few months ago when Baron Bigshot’s “precious little angel” (15-year-old holy terror) discovered baseball.
A boy holding a baseball bat | Source: Midjourney
Now, I’m all for kids being active, but this wasn’t just playing. This was like living next to a batting cage run by a group of caffeinated squirrels.
The neighborhood became a minefield of flying baseballs.
Poor Mrs. Franklin got the shock of her life while gardening. There she was, bottom-up, pulling weeds, when—THWACK! A fastball introduced itself to her butt. Ouch!
“Oh, dear Lord!” she’d shrieked, jumping up like a startled cat. I would’ve laughed if I wasn’t so horrified.
An older lady about to get hit by a baseball | Source: Midjourney
Then there was Mr. Johnson. Sweet old Mr. Johnson, who loved nothing more than to read Hemingway on his porch.
One minute he was lost in “The Old Man and the Sea,” the next he was seeing stars, and not the metaphorical kind.
“I’ve lived through war,” he’d grumbled as the paramedics loaded him into the ambulance, “but I never thought I’d be taken down by a teenager with a baseball.”
A baseball lying near an old man | Source: Midjourney
One by one, our neighbors began fortifying their homes. Windows disappeared behind wooden planks, turning our charming street into a bizarre hybrid of Mayberry and a zombie apocalypse movie set.
But me? I held out. Call it stubbornness or plain old foolishness, but I refused to board up my windows like we were preparing for a hurricane.
That front window was Pancy and Bella’s favorite sunbathing spot, and by God, I wasn’t going to take that away from them.
“You’re playing with fire, Angela,” Mrs. Stewart warned me one day. “That boy’s aim is about as good as a drunk playing darts.”
I just shrugged. “What are the odds, right?”
Well, apparently, the odds were not in my favor. Because on that fateful Saturday, as I was putting the finishing touches on lunch, it happened.
Penny was sprawled on the living room floor, her coloring books spread around her like a rainbow explosion. Pancy and Bella were curled up nearby, occasionally casting longing glances at the blueberry pie cooling on the windowsill.
I was humming to myself, feeling like a domestic goddess, when suddenly—CRASH!
The sound of shattering glass filled the air, followed by a dull ‘plop’. Time seemed to slow down as I turned, watching in horror as shards of glass rained down, narrowly missing Penny’s head.
“Mommy!” she wailed, her eyes wide with fear.
I rushed to her, scooping her up and checking for injuries. “It’s okay, baby. Mommy’s got you.”
But as I held my trembling daughter, I felt something else rising in me. Rage. Pure, unadulterated rage.
I marched outside, the offending baseball clutched in my hand like a grenade. Baron Bigshot was in his driveway, polishing his luxury car with the care most people reserve for newborns.
“Hey!” I shouted, storming up to him. “Your son’s baseball just came through my window. It nearly hit my daughter!”
He barely glanced up. “Oh? And you’re sure it was my son’s ball?”
I thrust the blueberry pie-lathered ball in his face. “Unless baseballs are falling from the sky now, yes, I’m pretty sure.”
He sighed, like I was some peasant interrupting his important car-polishing duties. “Look, Ms…”
“Angela. We’ve been neighbors for three years.”
He waved his hand dismissively. “Right, right. Angela. Do you have any proof it was my Billy’s ball?”
I stared at him, dumbfounded. “Proof? There’s pie filling on it!”
“Ah,” he nodded sagely, “so you admit you tampered with the evidence.”
I felt my eye start to twitch. “Listen here, Baron Big—”
“I beg your pardon?”
I took a deep breath. “Mr. Worthington. Your son broke my window. He could have seriously hurt my daughter. The least you could do is pay for the repairs.”
He chuckled, actually chuckled! “My dear, do you know how much that would cost?”
“Probably less than one of your car’s tires,” I muttered.
His eyes narrowed. “I don’t appreciate your tone. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a birthday party to prepare for. Important guests are coming, you understand. Out of my property!”
He said that. Yep! No apology. No NOTHIN’.
As he turned away, something in me snapped. “Oh, I understand perfectly. I understand that you care more about your fancy party than the safety of your neighbors!”
He spun around, his face red. “Now see here—”
But I was on a roll. “No, you see here! Your son has been terrorizing this neighborhood for months. We’ve all been too polite to say anything, but enough is enough. You need to take responsibility!”
“I suggest you leave now before I call the police for trespassing.”
Defeated and furious, I trudged back home, the sound of his expensive sprinkler system mocking me with every step.
The rest of the day passed in a blur of cleaning up glass and comforting a still-shaken Penny.
As evening fell, the sounds of Baron Bigshot’s party drifted over. Laughter, clinking glasses, and what I was pretty sure was a live band.
I was just about to close the curtains (what was left of them anyway) when I saw something odd. A group of young men in masks, all wearing football jerseys, was marching up Baron Bigshot’s perfectly manicured lawn.
“What in the world?” I murmured, pressing my nose against the wooden window sill divider.
Suddenly, they all raised their arms, each holding a football. And then, in perfect synchronization, they let loose.
Footballs rained down on Baron Bigshot’s party like a sports equipment hailstorm. I watched, mouth agape, as chaos erupted.
Guests screamed and ducked, champagne flutes shattered, and Baron Bigshot himself stood in the middle of it all, looking like a man who’d just seen his worst nightmare come to life.
As quickly as it started, it was over. The football players high-fived each other and jogged away, leaving destruction in their wake.
I was still trying to process what I’d seen when there was a knock at my door. It was Mrs. Stewart, grinning like the cat that got the cream.
“Did you see that?” she asked, barely containing her glee.
I nodded, still stunned. “What… how…”
She winked. “Let’s just say my nephew’s football team owed me a favor. Thought our dear neighbor could use a taste of his own medicine.”
I couldn’t help it. I burst out laughing, tears streaming down my face. “Mrs. Stewart, you’re a genius!”
She patted my arm. “Sometimes, dear, karma needs a little push.”
The next morning, I was enjoying my coffee when there was a furious pounding at my door. I opened it to find Baron Bigshot, looking decidedly less baronial in his rumpled pajamas.
“YOU!” he sputtered, pointing an accusing finger at me. “You did this!”
I took a sip of my coffee, savoring the moment. “Did what?”
“Don’t play dumb! The football attack! It ruined everything!”
I raised an eyebrow. “Oh? And do you have any proof it was me?”
He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water, clearly recognizing his own words being thrown back at him.
I leaned against the doorframe, feeling surprisingly calm. “You know, Mr. Worthington, sometimes life has a funny way of teaching us lessons. Maybe this is yours.”
His face turned an impressive shade of purple. “This isn’t over!”
As he stormed off, I called after him, “Oh, and Mr. Worthington? You might want to consider investing in some wooden planks for your windows. I hear they’re all the rage these days.”
I closed the door, grinning to myself. Penny looked up from her coloring book, curiosity shining in her eyes.
“Mommy, why was that man yelling?”
I scooped her up, planting a kiss on her forehead. “Oh, sweetie. He just learned a very important lesson about being a good neighbor.”