When things were at their worst, my wife left me and our kids two years ago.
With only a bag and the cold, Anna stormed out of our apartment and said, “I can’t do this anymore.” I was left standing there with Max and Lily, our four-year-old twins.
For one second, we were a family. Then I was by myself with two kids and a lot of bills to pay.
As a software engineer, I worked for a computer company that said it would make a lot of money, but some shady things happened, and the company went out of business before we knew it. I went from making six figures a year to getting jobless checks in one night.
On the day I told Anna the news, I could see the sadness in her eyes. She worked in marketing and was one of the nicest people I’d ever seen. But I never thought she would leave when things were hard.
I did delivery work for grocery stores during the day and ride-sharing companies at night.
I was also taking care of the kids the whole time. Max and Lily were upset and kept asking where their mom was.
I was lucky that my parents were close. They helped me with the twins at night and whenever I needed it, but they couldn’t give me money.
Max and Lily, on the other hand, saved my life. As the day came to a close, their little arms around me and whispered, “We love you, Daddy.” This made me move forward. I had to keep my promise.
I’m glad things were so different the second year after Anna left. I got a freelance coding job, and the client was so impressed with my work that he hired me full-time to work from home for his defense company.
The income wasn’t huge, but it was steady. We moved to a warmer place, and I started taking better care of myself again. I worked out, made healthy meals, and set the kids up with a schedule.
Then, after exactly two years, I saw Anna again.
I caught up on work at a café near our new home while Max and Lily were at preschool.
She was sitting alone at a corner table with her eyes closed and tears running down her face.
This woman looked tired. Her hair was dull and her coat was faded. The dark lines under her eyes showed that she hadn’t slept well.
What did happen? Why did she have to cry in a cool coffee shop? I knew it wasn’t important. I should not pay attention to her, finish my drink, and leave right away. But she was my kids’ mother, after all.
When she looked into my eyes, her face went from shock to shame.
The woman who broke into our house is who I go up to. I leave my cup and laptop on the table.
“You left us.” You didn’t feel bad about leaving. Now, after two years, I find you crying in a café. “What’s going on?”
Once more, her head shook. “I don’t know why I left you, but it was so wrong.” I lost my job almost right away after that. My savings kept me going. My parents sent me some money, but after a few months, they stopped. When I needed them the most, the people I thought were my friends were gone.
She sneered and said, “I miss you.” “I need to go back.”
Anna reached across the table and put her hand on mine. “David, please.” I’ll do anything to make things right, even though I don’t deserve it. I’ve been moving from one temporary job to another and living in cheap flats. I’ve had time to think. I know what I lost now.
I took my hand off of you. “You didn’t think about Lily and Max, did you?” Not once every two years. In fact, you haven’t talked about them since I sat down.
I felt more and more disgusted as I thought about what had happened.
“Please, David.” “Give me a chance.”
I stood there with my back to her. “No,”
I went back to my desk, grabbed my laptop, and left.